measuring my inner bitch

Me at Food Emporium buying pancetta

I'd like it an inch thick

He cuts me a hair thin slice

I say no, much thicker, an inch thick

He cuts me a wafer thin slice

I say no, an inch thick

He says an inch is relative

and without thinking I say, no, an inch is an absolute measurement.

And he slices me the width I want (which, realistically, was no more than half an inch)

And I laughed to myself, an inch is a relative term.. well, not really.