fuck you cute animals

100 things to do, and even more to write up here, but this is what I find myself doing - going to this site and laughing at the text and cute animal photos.

Back soon with the real stuff...

Speed of Life

We went and saw Speed the Plow last night, and a review of it will follow but for this moment I want to focus on the conversation we had afterwards - which is, have any of us read anything that changed our lives.

I said change your life is a big statement. I've certainly read things that affected me, but changed me, changed my thinking, made me look at the world differently from when before I read it. (we extended the discussion to any art form - film, tv, art etc... Was there anything we saw or witnessed that was not part of 'real' life, that changed our lives.)

I've been thinking about it ever since. My immediate answer, last night, of something that I had read which changed my perspective, was the writing of Donald Winnocott. Perhaps it's because I didn't know very much about therapy when I read his thoughts, but his work on the 'good enough mother' and the idea that boredom is the sea from which creativity is borne are things I think about often and in depth.

And then 3 (out of 4 of us!) agreed that Ayn Rand had had a huge impact with her books. So a secret cult of Randists were dining together! I left Ayn Rand, needing something with more compassion, but when I was 17, I really loved her ideas.

And now I'm trying to think about it some more.. what have I read or seen, or observed that changed my perspective... Of course so many things have a drip, drip, drip affect. Which is why certain tv shows are not permitted in the house or why we don't let our 11 yo play certain computer games - things that have a negative effect are easy to find.

I really loved the works of Rumi, a Sufi poet. For a while, when reading him, I could enter his world of overwhelming love. I like poetry in general. There was a time where every so often I would email everyone a poem that had really spoken to me. And anyone who reads this blog will find songs that I remember and lyrics that I keep whispering in my mind. And I often read books who have a phrase, an image, an incident, which lingers and returns to me.

We all agreed that we had found these life changing texts when in college, where thinking about life and philosophy and who and what we are was the accepted thing to do.

And then I bumped into a friend in the school yard this morning and we discussed Jewish education and I said that I hoped/planned that our son would continue with his after his 13th birthday, that some of the best and most memorable school lessons I ever had were in my Jewish studies classes in years 9 - 12.

It's amazing that that jolt of cocaine that is Speed the Plow can give rise to such contemplation. Mamet would be pleased...

Liza from the past...

this is such a sweet song, and she sells it so well... Ring 'em bells indeed..

It starts like this: about a year ago - I heard this truly terrific, absolutely true story
And it just so happens that I told a couple of friends of mine this truly terrific, absolutely true story
And it just so happens that these friends of mine are song writers
And guess what happened, right, truly terrific, absolutely true song...

Maybe this time...

We saw a living legend the other night.

You know how there are just some people that you love, irrationally. You hear the gossip and get a whiff of the tabloid rumors and you just don't care. That's how I feel about Liza Minnelli. It doesn't matter what goes on in her private life, what show is a shambles, next time she's out, I'll be there again, with hope in my heart and love in my eyes. I just love her. And when it works, I remember why...

We went and saw the final dress rehearsal for her new show at the Palace theatre last week. And in the beginning, she was so nervous and oddly breathless, that I was worried. My friend, sitting next to me, snarkily said, 'you know she's only 62, she moves like an 80 year old.' And I said, '62 in Liza years, is more than 82 of anyone else's years!' - she's put her body through a lot of punishment, she's had 2 hip replacements and several knee operations and frankly, she moves like it. She moves hesitantly and painfully.

I've never seen such a warm and idiosyncratic audience. There were women with their faces stretched into kabuki masks of youth, and gay men in their 60's squealing like teenage girls. The audience was more than warm, it was a bunch of theatre moms in the room, all wishing their little egg on. They wanted her to succeed so much, they clapped every time she opened her mouth and gave a standing ovation at the end of the each song.

About the 3rd song in, she sang Charles Aznavour's What makes a man a man... and I thought, so many drag queens dress up and sing as Liza, and here's Liza, pretending to get up and be one of them, a lovely note of solidarity.

After that she got more comfortable, her panting reduced, and her voice opened. Her hand motions are so familiar, those 'jazz hands' that only she could pull them off. And yet she does, because they don't feel 'actory' they feel natural and innate. This is how she moves when she sings. She did tease us about her movements, acknowledging that she is older now 'you know how I used to sit in the second act, well now I sit in the first' as she pulls out a tall directors chair. But sit is scarcely the word as she writhes and moves, creating one perfect visual moment after another. I actually liked her better on the stool, she seemed more comfortable.

And when she sang 'maybe this time' (which was not in the original production but rather had been on her album first, I didn't' know that) I got goose bumps. She just sells it. She believes it and so do you, maybe this time she'll be lucky, as if she's had no luck in her life yet.

And that is Liza's astonishing gift, that she goes on stage is totally vulnerable, all raw nerves and that astonishing voice. So much talent, so little confidence, so much experience and yet no bedrock of knowledge, just that painful, wistful optimism, that maybe this time... for the first time...

Oh, it was a magic night.

I loved the second half less - it was all about Kay Thompson, her godmother and songs that she sang in the 40's which are not known now, and when you hear them, you know why... I kind of lost it for about 20 mins, getting restless but happy people watching (it's that kind of audience, they're part of the show). But when she sang New York, New York, the chills came back. To hear that iconic song, by that living legend, in New York. It doesn't get better than that. (ps it's not me shouting in the clip, (I was a good girl and didn't film anything) but it could have been!)

By the end of the show her hair was matted, she was sweating and panting again, and you were swept up in the moment. Liza gives and gives and gives (even in a dress rehearsal!) and you just have to love her for it.

I'm so happy this show is a success - for the audience and their enjoyment, but also for Liza, who I just love...

Most primitive sense

They say scent is one of the most primitive senses, liked straight back to the lizard part of your brain. And it's evocative, smell your grandmother's cake, and there you are, transported back in time.

For many years I wore Ma Griffe, and then, all of a sudden it disappeared from the shelves. In the age of the internet, I suddenly thought, I wonder if they make it still? And here I found it, at this wonderful site (great prices!) and I've ordered myself a new bottle, so the scent of my 20's can return...

Happy find!

Nice care...

I was reading an article in the nyt about the 6 habits of hightly respectful physicians and came across this posting in the comments afterwards (I love the comments, they are often more interesting than the articles, one of the benefits of the internet, that the article becomes the starting point and a conversation grows...)

During my residency we had a speaker from our professional society discuss some current state of the field topic. Somewhere in his talk he said something that has stuck with me. Nearly all patients don't know the difference between good care and not good care. What they do know, however, is the difference between "nice care" and "not nice care."

While being nice may not actually improve overall health outcomes it does improve the patient's experience and subsequently their view of our profession. There is zero downside to taking the time to introduce yourself, shake hands, and make them feel that their needs are going to be addressed.

And I thought, that’s so true of so many things. We often don't know the expertise required or the effort expended behind so many things, but we know when we are treated nicely or respectfully or not.

We are having a problem with one of our teachers at school, and the issue was that we didn’t know if she was teaching the curriculum correctly or not, but we did know that she wasn’t explaining herself clearly to the parents and this was giving her a host of problems that had nothing to do with her expertise.

And that’s where American customer service can excel or fail – if someone reads a screed from a computer screen with no feeling or humanity, the care might be ‘good’ but it’s definitely not ‘nice’ and you don’t feel looked after. It’s only when the other person makes a connection with you that you remember the service as good, even if they couldn’t do what you asked (at least they could explain – ‘the computer says no…’ to quote Little Britain…)

And that’s what I’ve been thinking about today…

More on Liza tomorrow (she was wonderful!)

more about coupons

see I was just ahead of the curve - check out this nyt article, basically I could have written it :)